Grandfather of the Gurp

Now normally I would not post the type of low brow crappy camera phone picture you see above, but this old man made my weekend so his story simply  had to be told & sans photo of said geezer it just wouldn’t be the same. I ran across this gentleman at a local music venue/dive bar that a friend’s rock band was playing. He had been drinking scotch on the rocks and having a grand old time since about 9pm. He couldn’t have been more than 5ft. 2, was at least seventy years of age and was in the company of his wife who had a broken arm in a sling. About halfway through the opening set Gramps started feeling himself and took  it to the floor. As he cut his way through a mean rug he encountered my Worst Case Scenario co-host & local man-eater The Snow Shark. Sadly, as the two threw down what was possibly the most  furious tandem Molly Ringwald  in recorded history in the front row, some mammoth twenty-something metal-head thrashing his way through the universe slammed himself into the wounded and now bewildered wife of the hot-footed septuagenarian, a slight that would not sit lightly with this aged war veteran.  The old man gave this fat bastard a good shove to get him away from the wife and things seemed to calm down for a while. But about 20 minutes later the couple called a cab and on their way out of the bar their paths crossed once again with the big man and the old fella settled the score with a swift 3 piece to the fat boy’s jaw laying him flat in the street & knocking him out cold in front of all the smoker’s on the sidewalk out front, myself being one of them. As an official party bonus the old man stood next to the cab & waited for the plump little punching bag to awaken, lunging back in his face and asking “You want another piece of me?!”

Speaking for us all, no sir we do not. None of  us want to get knocked the fuck out by a senior citizen in front of all our peers.