summer approaches and whatnot, dick jokes abound…..
In case you are unaware Macon Beatz is the white B.A. Baruckus. If it hadn’t been before, this was proven to the fullest on our recent trip to Tahoe when he drove the Weekend Cult’s already enfeebled tour vehicle, known to friends and aficionados alike as the Chicken Bus through disastrous, white-out blizzard conditions with broken windshield wipers. Enthusiastically proving man’s mastery over the elements, the environment itself & all manner of beast that walks or crawls within it, Macon opened the driver’s side door of the van, sans 4 wheel drive, and sojourned through the Donner Pass with one hand on the wheel & half of his body hanging out of the vehicle for better highway vision. All the while his camera in his left hand taking pictures of his own shit-storm eating grin. It was this harrowing journey that inspired Macon Beatz latest mixtape “The Ultimate Chicken Bus Mix”… Suck it nature.
Next Friday, February 24th at the Elbo Room in San Francisco marks the album release party for the Fist Fam’s latest full length (yes another one) “Weekend Cult”. That being more or less the starter pistol for a string of releases by the Gurp City South Crew. 2012 will see albums from TopR, Foul Mouth Jerk, Scofflaw, The Ville Boyz, the Worst, and possibly more. So in honor of a future that is startlingly bright for a confederation of potential cirrhosis candidates & to educate these young buckets only just now upping themselves on the science of Gurpology, we take a look back at the history of the Gurp City Crew by posting this link to the in-retrospect-ironically named “Dead In A Year” a remastered compilation of hits from 1999-2004. This noteworthy collection of classics features the distinguished production high-jinks of Verse Murphy, Z-Trip & Radar as well as the superior rap shenanigans of OG Triple OG’s Brandon B, Eddie K, Luke Sick & Z-Man. Aside from being inundated with an overwhelming amount of gems that would hit just as hard if dropped in the distant future, it contains some of the funniest skits ever put to tape. In particular my favorite skit of all time “Coked Out In The 80’s” , few things are simultaneously this funny & historically accurate. So peep the skit & follow it back to the album, which is amazingly, also available for free download.
This weekend my buddy Vlad & I ventured down to Atlanta to watch Gurp City O.G. TopR Holiday battle Baltimore’s Richard Cranium for Grind Time’s “Nuclear Winter 2” event. Currently Cranium has been on a tear, earning stripes & a reputation as one of the up & coming young beasts in the league. TopR a grizzled vet, had at least a decade on just about all the competitors & the demeanor of Buttermaker, head coach of the Bad News Bears. The club was situated in a markedly turfed out section of the ATL, right behind Turner field which seemed appropriate for the days events. After a short parking lot cypher with rappers Real Talk & Manifest Destiny we were ushered inside by club owner & comedic genius Sam Stone, informing us that it was time to come in or be locked out for the remainder. That probably should have sent up a red flag. What kind of club locks several hundred patrons inside at the start of the party, at 3:30 in the afternoon no less? Answer; the kind who is worried less about the monster fire hazard it’s just created than the non-patrons outside the club.
As the crowd gathered & the competition was about to commence the unmistakeable sound of gun play rang out from just in front of the building. Not just the casual pop-pop your of run-of-the-mill fuckery. But the distinct & repeated report of dueling calibers of small arms. Looking incredulously to Vlad I asked with a silent eye brow twitch if I had just heard what I thought I had. And nodding with the easy assurance of a cynical bastard he confirmed that I had. Looking around it seemed that either no one else had heard the shots, or that this club was even more hood than previously suspected, and nobody gave a fuck. It turned out to be the former when moments later there was a pounding at the door & an unsuspecting Sam Stone, thinking it was a late battle entry unlocked & opened it. In stumbles a man with a dreadlocked mohawk hunched over & bleeding with a fully discharged glock in hand, makes it halfway across the room & collapses in the corner. For a brief minute there I thought we were watching this human take his last breath. Luckily, depending on how you look at it I guess, the guy had only had about half his index finger blown off. In the words of Sam Stone at that moment “Wow, this guy just came in & changed the whole feng shui of everything”. Quite an auspicious beginning to the rap battle… personally I blame hip hop music.
Following a brief interlude with the police, but surprisingly no ambulance the competition was resumed. As they say the show must go on. All of the battles that day were considerably entertaining and the 3rd match on the card was the one I came to see. Cranium came out with a strong showing referring to the Ogre as “Bi-furious” amongst other things. But the old man had the juice… and about a foot plus sixty pounds on the guy, not to mention 8 shots of Jack Daniels. Besides bringing size into it like a school yard bully, the 15 plus years of stage experience on how to command a room gave TopR a decisive edge, which he used to repeatedly reign flurries of punchlines on Cranium’s…um head (which only feels redundant), that he couldn’t recover from. TopR won a unanimous decision from all 5 judges in 3 rounds… Gurp City South, flawless victory.
Unfortunately we couldn’t record any video of the event, since that is the exclusive purview of Grind Time & their associates. But they will be posting it soon & when they do I will be sure to post the link here. Congratulations to the Ogre, TopR & to my man with the Dread Mohawk, I hope you find your finger. The irony of being shot in the trigger finger was not lost on me, sir.
Gurp City South's Late Xmas
Thursday, December 29, 2011
9:00pm - All Ages
Grey Eagle (map)
185 Clingman Ave
Asheville, NC, USA 28801
Fist Fam, Foul Mouth Jerk, TopR, The Ville Boyz, DJ Football & Youngin Go Hard invite you to their ALL AGES Christmas Party 2011 at the Grey Eagle. Dec. 29
On my recent trip out to The Bay I had the good fortune to sleep off most of my benders fully dressed, in Ronnie Mac’s lazy boy. One of the fringe benefits of Pappy’s upright slumber suite is that his room mate is S.F. underground stalwart & Gurp City production genius Optik. Probably best known for producing the entirety of TopR’s “Cheap Laughs For Dead Comedians” album, Optik has also produced UG classics for the likes of Z Man, Fist Fam & more. Shortly after his work on Cheap Laughs he began work on a his own album, featuring an all-star team of the rappers with whom he frequently collaborates. I had the good timing to be in town during a few of these sessions & ended up on a couple of the joints that were recorded for the album. As often happens with independent music some time has passed & for whatever reasons the album has yet to be released. So rather than keep all these gems to himself Optik recently began leaking a few of them on his “The Chillout blog” & soundcloud etc. This week’s release is called “Times”(The End is Near) ft. Foul Mouth Jerk, TopR & Word Smiff. You can can grab the download below along with a few other unreleased Optik rarities.
Fist Fam’s OG Triple OG DJ Macon Beatz steps back into the mixtape spotlight with his brand new All Gurp City Mix. This release is 43 mins of material spanning several years from both the West Coast & Down Souf branches of the Gurp City Crew, including The Fist Fam, Eddie K, TopR, Foul Mouth Jerk, The Ville Boyz, Smidi , Z-Man and more. Perfect party music. So don’t sleep… Pass out.
Now that my week of slacking is over it’s time to get back on my posting grind. It is in that spirit that I give you the last installment of our deep, penetrating probe on the physical act of love with man’s best friend & other quadrupeds. This clip includes a call-in from an audience member with a suspiciously extensive amount of information to share on the topic. Far be it from me to call into question the proclivities of Worst Case Scenario listeners. I’m not here to judge, merely to assail character, slanderously accuse, and sometimes impune. With any luck there will be more highlights soon to come, on topics other than the salacious treatment of cherished family pets. But that may be a rather ambitious hope for the breadth of our subject matter. For some reason this clip of pt.3 is accidentally labeled as pt.2… nonetheless it is actually pt. 3
After marking the 2 year anniversary of Gurp City South’s online radio program Worst Case Scenario we finally launched live video streaming of each week’s episode via Twitter, which may turn out to be a brilliant stroke of marketing or a fatally stupendous error depending on how the broadening audience reacts to the myriad of retarded conversations & activities intrinsic to the staff of our show. Such behavior clearly exemplified by the 2nd week of live video broadcasting when co-host Hollywood Cole, showing up adrift on Jameson, subsequently put me in a headlock & jail raped my face by licking my beard 7 separate times. A gesture that from my perspective would have gone gleefully unviewed by the listening audience, but appeared to be a career highlight in the questionable opinions of my co-conspirators.
A secondary benefit of the video feed is that we get to chop up some of the funnier segments into short, digestable pieces. Which brings us to today’s post, the 1st of a hopefully consistent series of Worst Case Scenario highlight reels on GCS. Herein part 1 of a conversation about a man in Memphis, TN caught in the throes of passion with his neighbor’s dog. If you enjoy, the show can be listened to live every Thursday from 10pm to midnight on
or you can just go to the archives on said page at anytime during the week for that week’s episode. To watch live or to check out previous episodes via twitcast check us out here:
In the first year of broadcasting Wost Case Scenario we often assumed that we would be kicked off the air largely for the slapdash, lackluster, obnoxiously negligent manner of the show, or perhaps just because of the sheer heroic volume of wanton on-air drinking by the cast. In year two, between the shameless sexual harassment of female callers by poorly impersonated versions of Sean Connery & Morgan Freeman, and attempts to get grown women to text sweet booby shots to our 15 year old Hungarian intern, we began to appreciate the likelihood that our defrocking would could come on the heels of possible criminal charges.
It is only now in the onset of our third year on the air that our shenanigans have really begun to hit their stride so to speak, perfecting the art of pushing the envelope of bad taste right to the razor thin borderline of obscenity and/or pornography and the outright corruption of a minor, without crossing over. Congratulations us. As promised the link below is part 2 of the 2 year anniversary episode featuring members of the Fist Fam & others. Thank you for supporting the foolish absurdities of a gang of reputed wise crackers and the questionable buffoonery of known punchinellos.